


You Are the One (I Was Meant to Find)

by imagined_haven



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Deliberately Obtuse Riku, First Kiss, Frustrated Sora, M/M, Not Beta-Read: We Die Like Men, Post-Kingdom Hearts III, Relationship Discussions, Requited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-19
Updated: 2019-04-19
Packaged: 2020-01-16 08:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18517285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imagined_haven/pseuds/imagined_haven
Summary: “Say what you want about destiny, and about fate. I say I can take my destiny into my own hands if I want. I say we both can.”In which Sora fights for who he loves... even if the person he has to fightisthe person he loves.





	You Are the One (I Was Meant to Find)

**Author's Note:**

> Me: Okay. We're back on the horse now. We've got this whole series planned. Wait, what are you doing?
> 
> Me to me: um... something completely out of the continuity of anything I have planned?
> 
> Me: _Why?_
> 
> Me to me: JUST LET IT HAPPEN.
> 
> ~*~*~*~*~
> 
> Inspired by _Rewrite the Stars_ from the soundtrack (and movie!) _The Greatest Showman_.

Sora had tried for years to make things work with Kairi. Really, he had, and he figured if _literally dying for her_ wasn’t enough of an effort than he wasn’t sure what was.  
  
He understood the argument, sure. Everyone said they were meant to be together. He’d even believed it himself, for a little while. Or maybe he’d just lied to himself convincingly enough. He couldn’t be sure, not really.  
  
Point was, he had _tried_ , okay? From traversing the worlds to save her, to sharing that _stupid_ paopu fruit with her, to almost losing _everything_ just to make sure she lived on. Yes, she was the light in the darkness. Yes, she was a princess of heart and shaping up to be a talented Keyblade wielder to boot. Yes, their hearts were linked and their lives would always be intertwined.  
  
Sora just wasn’t sure he wanted it like _that_. In fact, he was pretty sure he didn’t.  
  
If only he could convince… well, anyone else.  
  
Donald and Goofy tended to laugh whenever they went anywhere together, at some sort of joke that only they were in on. It had been funny at first, but it had gotten very old very fast, especially when as fellow Keyblade wielders they were expected to _train_ together on a daily basis.  
  
Aqua, who had taken on the role of organizing training sessions for everyone not actively on missions, seemed to take particular joy in pairing the two of them together. She also acted entirely too innocent when directly asked about it. No, she was trying to plot something, Sora was certain.  
  
Roxas, who should really have _known better_ thanks to the unique nature of their relationship, delighted in teasing the pair of them as well. Of the individuals who had spent time residing within his heart, only Ventus really seemed to understand, likely due to the length of time he had spent there. Even then, his understanding was mostly limited to helplessly looking on while the others either mocked Sora endlessly or attempted to play matchmaker.  
  
But out of everyone, Riku was the worst about it.  
  
He’d been the first to suggest the two of them being together, back before Sora knew love could be anything other than what you felt for your friends and your family. He’d been the first to mention the paopu fruit, and Sora had barely been back for five _minutes_ after his latest misadventure before Riku suggested he have a talk with Kairi.  
  
It was maddening, if Sora was being honest with himself. Especially since he’d _told_ Riku that when he’d finally started thinking about that kind of thing it hadn’t been Kairi he’d been thinking of.  
  
But that wasn’t going to happen. No, Riku had made it perfectly clear what he thought of that.  
  
Except he hadn’t, not really. He’d never said he didn’t want Sora back. He just kept doggedly pushing Sora and Kairi together instead like if he tried it enough times it’d finally stick. Sora was sick of it, and he was going to give Riku a piece of his mind once and for all, if only he could track the older boy down for five minutes alone.  
  
As if he knew what Sora was thinking, Riku was almost impossible to find outside of common areas, and even then he was rarely around these days. He was always off on missions, or doing… _some_ thing with the other Masters. Sora wasn’t sure what, because Riku wasn’t _talking_ to him, not like he used to. It was driving him crazy.  
  
Wait. Was that…  
  
_Yes_ , Sora thought as he levered himself off of the wall he was leaning against to chase after the glimpse of silver hair he’d seen.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Aqua eyes widened as Sora dragged Riku into the nearest room and slammed the door shut, summoning his Keyblade to make sure it stayed that way. “Sora, what—?”  
  
“You’ve been avoiding me,” Sora responded, feeling all of the irritation of the past month come to a head in that moment.  
  
“I’ve been busy.” Was Riku slowly backing away from him? He _was_. Unfortunately for the young Master, he hadn’t thought out his escape route, and was backing himself into a corner without any help from Sora whatsoever.  
  
Sora decided to help anyway, following him as he retreated. “You’re making excuses. Everyone else has a day off every once in a while.”  
  
“I have to—” Riku cut himself off as his back hit the wall, suddenly looking nervous.  
  
“Just _five minutes_ , okay? Just give me five minutes and then you can get back to whatever Masterly things you were doing that means you’ve been avoiding your friends.” Sora had no intention of letting him go after just five minutes, of course, but it sounded nice.  
  
Sure enough, Riku nodded. “I guess that’s fair. We haven’t really had a chance for the three of us to catch up lately.”  
  
“Good.” Sora looked around the room for the first time. It was a small study, not much more than a few bookcases and a desk with— _ah_. Two chairs. Perfect. “Now, do I have to keep you here so you won’t run, or will you sit and _talk_ to me?”  
  
“We can sit,” Riku said quickly. Was that a tremble in his voice? Sora couldn’t be sure.  
  
As they both sat Sora felt a brief moment of nervousness, before brushing it aside. What did he have to lose? He’d already told Riku everything, put it all on the line, and Riku had already brushed him off before. If nothing else, he’d understand _why_. “Listen, about the last time we talked…”  
  
Sure enough, Riku visibly stiffened. “Sora…”  
  
“What? I think I deserve to know how you made the leap from me telling you I _love_ you to engineering every possible situation for me to get with _Kairi_.”  
  
“You’re just—”  
  
“So help me, Riku, if you say I’m just confused I will _end_ you.”  
  
Riku blinked, and then laughed, though it was clear he found very little about the situation funny. “So much for the Guardian of Light. You casually threaten all your friends like that?”  
  
And just like that, Sora could feel the anger burning in his chest. “Maybe you’d know if you’d _talk_ to me every once in a while!”  
  
“Okay, fine, I guess I deserve that,” Riku allowed.  
  
Sora sighed. “Look, I’ve spent a _lot_ of time with nothing to do but think. When… when I was gone, when I was just a wandering heart that somehow didn’t die, I got to know myself. And… it’s always been you. Not her, _never_ her, and it’s not like I didn’t try, okay?”  
  
“That’s not what you would’ve said before all this,” the older boy protested.  
  
“I was _fourteen_ ,” Sora retorted. “I was fourteen, and my best friend in the world seemed to think it was a great idea that I end up with her. And so I tried to think that way, tried to imagine… but I couldn’t. And now I know it’s because she’ll always be a part of me, but my heart isn’t hers to have.”  
  
“Sora…”  
  
“I can take it if you don’t feel the same,” Sora interjected. “You’ve already said no. Well, actually, you haven’t, which is why I’m asking now. Why do you keep trying to set me up with Kairi when I’ve already told you how _I_ feel?”  
  
Riku deflated, gaze dropping to a corner of the floor. “You… you and she belong together. You’re both such beacons of light and hope. It’s what everyone expects for a reason, and I know you could be great together if you’d just—”  
  
“If I’d just lie to myself for the rest of my life?”  
  
“ _Sora_.”  
  
“Sorry, sorry, I just couldn’t help it,” he apologized.  
  
Riku sighed. “We all grew up together, so I know how well you both know each other. She’s a princess of heart, you’re one of the Guardians of Light. I’d even go so far as to call you its champion.”  
  
Sora blushed, but before he could say anything Riku continued on.  
  
“Neither of you need someone like me dragging you down,” Riku admitted. “You both deserve someone with as much light as you.”  
  
“Forget what we deserve!” Sora shouted. “That’s not what I’m asking you for. I don’t care what you think I _deserve_ , I care what you _want_.”  
  
Was that a blush tinging Riku’s cheekbones in the faintest pink shades? “It doesn’t matter what I want, it never has.”  
  
“It matters to me,” Sora protested.  
  
Suddenly Riku leaned forward, both hands flat on the table between them. “Sora, it doesn’t _matter_ what I want. This isn’t something we can have.”  
  
Sora could feel the color draining from his face. “Why not?”  
  
“Think about it, Sora. Think about how the worlds would react to their hero getting with the guy who fell to darkness and almost—”  
  
“But you _came back_ ,” Sora interrupted. “You came back, and you do the best job of _anyone_ walking the balance between the light and the dark, it’s so amazing to me and I know it is to them too.”  
  
But Riku shook his head. “It’s a novelty, maybe. And don’t get me wrong, I’m happy with where I am now. It took a lot of work to get to this place. But… if we did this, everyone would just say I’m dragging you down with me.”  
  
“That doesn’t even make _sense_.”  
  
“Doesn’t it? I’m not made of light like you and Kairi, Sora, and it shows.” Riku stood, gently pushing his chair in. “And your five minutes were up two minutes ago.”  
  
“But—”  
  
“Sora, I _can’t_ , and that’s final,” Riku said firmly, long strides taking him to the door in moments.  
  
“Then look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want me!”  
  
Riku laughed again, but his face belied the sound, expression strained. “Don’t you get it, Sora? I can’t. But that doesn’t mean I can have you, and that doesn’t make this a good idea.”  
  
Sora froze, and the door quietly shut behind Riku.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Three weeks had passed since their last conversation, and Sora was more frustrated than ever. If he’d thought it was difficult to track Riku down before, it was all but impossible now, the young Master throwing himself into mission after mission.  
  
“I just don’t _get_ it,” he complained to Kairi as he blocked her strike.  
  
“I think I might,” she admitted, spinning to strike him again from the other side.  
  
Sora was startled enough that the hit landed. “ _Ow_. What?”  
  
“Think about it, Sora. When was the last time you saw Riku just let himself have something he wanted, easy as that? He always overthinks things. Just like how sometimes you don’t think enough,” she added, eyes lit up with mirth.  
  
“Hey!” he protested, wildly swinging his Keyblade in her general direction.  
  
Kairi laughed and easily dodged. “Sorry, that was too easy. But seriously, Sora,” she continued, allowing her own Keyblade to disappear. “If I’m right… Riku fell the first time because he wanted something he’d convinced himself he couldn’t have.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Even when we were little, the two of you were always close. But he’d been putting distance between the two of you for months before everything happened. And yet… you told me that the last time you saw him, he was still reaching out to you, right?”  
  
“Well, yeah. He thought that portal to darkness was the start of the adventure the three of us had always—”  
  
“That the _two_ of you had always planned,” Kairi gently interjected. “I was just along for the ride there, because we happened to be friends and because I wasn’t from the islands.”  
  
Sora sighed. “Just… tell me what you’re thinking.”  
  
“Think about it, Sora. He’s always felt things way deeper than he feels safe letting on. If he thought it was safer to assume it’d be you and me together in the end, well.”  
  
“Okay, I guess that makes sense. But he _knows_ how I feel, why…”  
  
Kairi carefully sat on the ground, encouraging him to join her. “Oh, Sora. He’s scared. You may have said what you wanted, but his world has told him the opposite for years. He’s always so… aware, of where he came from. Of the path he took to get here, and how different that was from ours. And he listens when people talk, way more than you ever did.”  
  
“Hey!”  
  
“Sorry,” she giggled. “But you’ve gotta admit, you care way less about what people say about you than he does.”  
  
He sighed. “Okay, you may have a point there. But… what do I do now?”  
  
Kairi grinned, and just like that they were like two kids again, plotting in the Secret Place before their destinies had found them. “I thought you’d never ask. You’ve tried telling him, and it didn’t work. Now you’ve got to _show_ him.”  
  
“But how can I show him if he won’t be in the same _room_ as me?” Sora demanded.  
  
“Leave that to me,” she promised. “Now let’s get out of here before the others think we’re planning our wedding or something. Seriously, you have _got_ to figure this out with him before I ask Aqua for a spell to shut people up when they get on our cases.”  
  
“That may not be a bad plan anyway,” he said as he levered himself off the ground and then reached down to help her up. “Somehow I’ve got a feeling not even me shouting it from the rooftops would actually stop any of them.”  
  
Kairi laughed. “That’s probably true, but the sooner you figure it out and start acting lovey with the person you’re actually in love with the sooner they leave me alone to figure out who I am and maybe even what _I_ want next.”  
  
“I’ll do what I can,” he replied. “I’ve just got to get him to actually spend time in the same place as me for… even just a few minutes.”  
  
What Sora would _do_ with those few minutes, he wasn’t sure. But every time he’d had a plan before, it had backfired in spectacular fashion. Maybe the best plan was to have no plan at all, and just figure it out as he went.  
  
Besides, it had to actually happen first, and surely that was going to be the hard part.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Except either Kairi was way better at getting her way than Sora ( _absolutely true_ ), or after several weeks without further interaction from Sora Riku had let his defenses drop a little ( _also not impossible_ ), because it took her three days to engineer a situation in which the two of them were locked together in the library.  
  
Riku pounded on the door, just once. “Kairi!”  
  
“Sorry!” she shouted through the door, tone saying that she wasn’t sorry in the slightest. “But you two need to actually talk to each other and stop driving me crazy with your problems because you won’t _talk_!”  
  
“What did you _do_?” Riku demanded, eyes wide and overly bright against the paleness of his face.  
  
“Oh, just a little spell I learned from Aqua. I’ll let it drop when I’ve decided you’ve had enough time to work things out.”  
  
“ _What_.”  
  
But Kairi stopped answering after that, clearly having decided she was done letting Riku distract himself.  
  
Sora sighed. “In my defense, I didn’t know this was what she had in mind.”  
  
Just like that, Riku rounded on Sora. “You _knew_ about this?”  
  
Sora felt his spine stiffen. “I know she’s sick of being the go-between. I mean, think about it, wouldn’t you be?”  
  
“I guess so,” Riku quietly responded, looking away.  
  
“What is it?” Sora suddenly exclaimed.  
  
“What?”  
  
“What will it take to convince you that I know what I want and I don’t care what anyone else thinks?”  
  
“Sora…” Riku sighed.  
  
“No! Whenever I tell you what my heart says, you just tell me why I shouldn’t feel this way. Well, I’ve had enough. You want this, I want this, and why should anyone else have a say in whether or not we can be happy?”  
  
“Sora, I—”  
  
Sora cut him off. “I’m not finished! It’d be one thing if you could tell me you didn’t want this. But your only arguments are about everyone else. And whatever it takes to convince you, I’ll do it. Because in the end, all they want… all _I_ want… is to be happy. I think that’s all anyone wants, really. And don’t you think after all this time, we deserve just a little bit of happiness?”  
  
Riku’s eyes flickered from object to object, never resting on one place and never meeting Sora’s gaze. His face was pale and drawn, and he was biting his lip nervously. “I…”  
  
Sora stopped in his tracks, eyes wide, before frowning. “That’s it, isn’t it? You don’t think you deserve to be happy.”  
  
“…I think you deserve all the happiness in all the worlds, Sora. I just don’t think you can really find it with me.”  
  
“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard,” Sora insisted. “How could I not be happy when you’re by my side?”  
  
Riku’s eyes widened, though he still didn’t look at Sora. “I…”  
  
Sora sighed. “Kairi was right. Words won’t convince you, will they? You’ve spent so long telling yourself all the reasons you shouldn’t that it’s all you can think of.”  
  
“Sora, where are you going with this?”  
  
“I’m saying that there has to be something I can _do_. Something that’ll get through to you that our happiness is up to us and no one else gets to decide what that looks like. So tell me what that is, Riku. Tell me what it is and I’ll do it.”  
  
Riku hesitated, a faint pinkness high on his cheekbones. “You…”  
  
Sora groaned in frustration, one hand fisting in his own hair. He would wait Riku out if it killed him. He had to know.  
  
The only problem with that idea was he had never been very patient, and Riku seemed all too happy to take that moment to crawl back into his shell and compose himself. That wouldn’t do at all; Sora had a feeling Riku needed to feel a little uncomfortable if he was ever going to get the truth out of him.  
  
With that thought in mind, Sora slowly started moving toward him. As predicted, Riku tried to slip away, but Sora was done letting that work. He was done chasing his oldest friend, once and for all.  
  
Soon enough, they found themselves in a corner, Riku’s back against the wall, his eyes wide, and oh, that _was_ a blush. Sora cheered internally, before pressing closer to the point that Riku _had_ to look at him, hands pressing against the wall on either side of Riku’s face. Even then, Riku couldn’t quite meet his eyes, gaze focused about level with what Sora figured was likely his nose, but it would have to do. “Riku, please. Tell me you don’t want this and I’ll back off. All I would ask is that you stop trying to force me and Kairi to happen when it never will.”  
  
“Sora…”  
  
“It won’t, Riku. We’d never be happy together, not really. Not when my heart’s set on someone else. Say what you want about destiny, and about fate. I say I can take my destiny into my own hands if I want. I say we both can. If it goes wrong, so be it. But I can’t just sit back and let myself get forced into a role I don’t even _want_ , Riku.”  
  
The taller man forced out a weak laugh. “You know, I’d forgotten just how you _never shut up_ when you’ve got your mind set on proving me wrong.”  
  
“Only about things that are important. And this… this is probably the most important thing I’ve ever tried to convince you of. Please, just once, listen to your heart instead of your brain and tell me what it says.”  
  
“I…”  
  
Sora sighed. “Please, if you want this… if you want _me_ … if you _love_ me like I love you, please stop letting yourself get in your own way.”  
  
Riku raised a trembling hand to rest on Sora’s shoulder. “You really want this.”  
  
Sora nodded.  
  
“Even though I’m not—”  
  
“So help me, Riku, if you talk down about yourself _one more time_ —”  
  
“I’m just pointing out the truth, but fine.” Riku sighed. “There’s no convincing you, is there? That you deserve so much better than anything I could ever give you.”  
  
Sora couldn’t help a laugh. “I’ve been trying to tell you, it’s not about what you think I _deserve_. It’s not about this image you have in your head where I’m all sunshine and rainbows and you’re just some storm cloud threatening to mess it all up. It’s about _us_. Who we really are, and what we really want. Not what anyone else says we _should_ want. Not—”  
  
Evidently Riku had had enough of Sora rambling on. Either that, or Sora had finally convinced him. Sora wasn’t sure which it was, but frankly he couldn’t care one way or the other, because Riku was finally kissing him like he’d wanted _forever_ and it was even better than he could’ve hoped for.  
  
Helpless to do anything but bask in it, Sora allowed his eyes to flutter shut as he pressed himself closer to Riku. One of his hands slid from the wall to the back of Riku’s neck, and he felt his head tilt slightly so they fit even closer together.  
  
Just as Sora was starting to think about how they could get even _closer_ , Riku’s hand traced along his jaw before he pulled back slightly. Sora opened his mouth to protest, but then he realized Riku didn’t look like he was about to run away. No, he was flushed and breathless, eyes darkened to the point of almost being green and unfocused. Sora was pretty sure Riku should look like that forever.  
  
Deciding now was as good a time as any to get started on that goal, Sora used the hand on the back of Riku’s neck to tug him down into a second kiss that was somehow even better than the first. Surprisingly, Riku indulged him for a few wonderful moments before putting a little space between them with a hand on each of Sora’s shoulders.  
  
Sora couldn’t help a small noise of protest, which made Riku actually smile for the first time Sora could remember in months. “Just for a little bit, Sora,” he chuckled. “We can’t just act like this solves everything.”  
  
“I know, but do we have to talk everything out _now_?” Sora had to admit he was a little embarrassed by how that question turned into a whine by the end.  
  
“No,” the taller man allowed. “But we should probably start trying to find a way out of this room before someone tries to look for us. I’m not sure I trust that Kairi dropped that spell.”  
  
Sora sighed. “You’re probably right. But… maybe we could stay a few more minutes?”  
  
Riku glanced away, but then finally looked him properly in the eye. “You really want this? Want…”  
  
“I’ve been trying to say that for _months_ ,” Sora groaned.  
  
“Okay. It’s… going to take time for me to believe that,” Riku admitted.  
  
“That’s fine. Well, it’s _not_ , but I get it. But this can’t just be you deciding what I am and what I need. I’m not… I’m not like Kairi, okay, I’m not some pure light to put on a pedestal somewhere. Wait, that came out wrong, maybe don’t tell her I said that.”  
  
Riku laughed. “I won’t. And you’re right, maybe I’ve been… but you have to understand, the way you fight to protect that light, it’s something I don’t know if I could ever reach. It inspires me to remember my own light, even though I’ve accepted by now that there’s darkness in me too.”  
  
Sora leaned in and kissed him softly to shut him up, reveling in the fact that this was something he was apparently allowed to do now. “We can talk about this _later_. You promised.”  
  
“I guess I did,” Riku allowed.  
  
Sora knew Riku was right, and they’d have to talk about this eventually. He was also right that this wouldn’t be easy. Maybe this wasn’t the destiny everyone had thought he’d find. But it was a future Sora was willing to fight for, and he’d finally overcome the largest barrier between himself and the person he loved. If he could talk Riku into allowing himself to be happy for a change, he could do whatever it took to make sure they stayed that way.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for making it this far!
> 
> ...I feel like now is the appropriate time to mention that because of the inspiration, this was almost a circus AU. Because the idea of Riku doing aerial work? *whistles* But my self-indulgence can only extend so far. Probably.


End file.
